Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Love: The moral roots of liberals and conservatives

A year ago if you had told me that I'd be falling in love with a Republican, I'd have punched laughed in your face. I almost didn't go out with him. But, he seemed open-minded and I was willing to take a risk.

I'm glad I did. The past year has been the best of my life.

I'll spare you all of the smooshy details of my relationship, but I do want to tell you how thankful I am that I'm becoming the open-minded person I thought I once was by falling in love with a Republican.

It's hard to hate someone you're in love with. So you have to find a way to understand where he's coming from, even if his opinions occasionally piss you off.

A lot of people think it's novel that I, the liberal Obama-loving girl, am dating the conservative who works in politics. While we do have some core values and beliefs that differ, we actually agree on the social issues that are most important to me.

During one of the early debates that occurred between us, I was worried that my opinion meant little to him because it was largely based on emotional conviction and not necessarily well-articulated facts. He said something to me that put my fears to rest: "Nobody's opinion. Matters more to me. Than yours."

How can you learn to love and accept people you disagree with? Have we lost the ability to do that with our modern-day sensational politics?

Watching this TED.com video helped me make sense of what I was learning in my heart for months: That the cartoon I had painted of conservatives—as unbendingly rigid fuckwits with no moral compass—was unfair and close-minded. To this day I catch myself judging people before I take a breath and put myself in their shoes for a minute. I may not ever agree with their beliefs, but I can't go on thinking they're just plain evil.

Food for thought. Watch this video and let me know what you think in the comments!


Jonathan Haidt on the moral roots of liberals and conservatives

3 comments:

Marie Young (Young Creative) said...

It is wonderful to hear how you've make this relationship work. In the end we are all just people. The labels shouldn't matter as much as they do. Meeting in the middle makes for a great relationship.

cmykdorothy said...

Thanks, Marie! Totally agree.

gohar said...

I hope it works out..

Remember that politics is a matter of opinion...not right or wrong.